honorless

Picked this back up, resigning myself to grinding my way to 10k via Thauzand's garage sale—only to find that I should have remembered this game's cardinal rule.

Talk to the NPCs.

The other three merchant lords were not useless assholes and as such gave me easy sidequests for 2.5k each. Got swindled (fuck you), moved on with the plot, thoroughly destroyed three of the four plot baddies blocking shop doors. Trundled up to Thauzand's shop.

WTF DEMON *crushed by Darkra/Blitzblade*

After fighting nothing but normal enemies and the NPCs' incessant fire shield/water weapon blather...how was I supposed to be prepared for that? Maybe I missed something (should I have ventured up the tower?) but this felt like the first truly bullshit enemy I've had to deal with. Though after being properly equipped nobody died, so he wasn't quite as rough as Trollud.

I have a theory that if you do nothing but Boost when its eye is open, it won't annihilate you with Blitzblade—or at least the chances of it doing so drop severely. I probably also should have just made Yunita a white mage and kept her on healing duty because thinking back, that tactic seemed to make the other boss fights go a little more smoothly. But I wasn't expecting a boss anyway, so I guess it's not even worth theorizing about.

...aaand Jusqua is heading off alone again. I'm gonna assume the Demon was trying to tell me something and keep my light sword/darksteel shield equipped.

I noticed the "scoreboard" at the end of the boss rush, but thought nothing of it other than How the fuck would somebody finish this thing in 45 seconds, HAX >:((( Well played.

1. 0'45"00
2. 2'20"00
3. 3'50"00
4. 2'10"00
5. 2'50"00
6. 2'30"00

Last March was Thoroughly Stupid March. Let's see how this March fares:

360

• 1600 MSP - $19.99
• Eschatos - $76.90

PC

• BIT.TRIP BEAT - $4.99

Not bad.

Trucking along. I'll probably finish the entire thing this week. Went back and got all the treasure chests and levels I was missing. I don't think I'll have to backtrack anymore, and if I do, it at least won't be anything dramatic like the jump back to world 5 after acquiring the ghost transformation in world 7.

I think my conclusion will be that Starfy was worth playing, but I can't keep buying games that don't set my world on fire. Can't afford it; don't have the space. (Though I think I've done a pretty good job of keeping myself in check recently.) The real question is: what next?

I figured I'd take time off the games I'm stuck on (LOL LAYTON BLOCK PUZZLES) so I could put some time toward ones that I think I can finish off in the meantime. So maybe whenever I finish off these Layton games I'll have a few things to send back at once or something.

Starfy is both easier and vastly more entertaining than I thought it would be. I started it up this afternoon and am probably about halfway through. What's becoming a little annoying is that as of world 4 they've started putting in treasure chests or doors you can't get to because you don't have the proper ability or transformation. Worse was 5-2, which must be run through twice because there's a treasure chest down both paths.

...I don't mind this in Mario games, and I couldn't figure out why. I think it's this: typically the alternate paths in Mario have some kind of skill threshold. Gotta avoid taking damage to preserve a powerup, or get a jump right. With Starfy, you don't lose abilities/transformations when you get hit, and nothing has required precision—so revisiting old levels just becomes tedious. It doesn't help that the levels can be kinda long.

Anyway, whenever Bunston picks up his newest ability, I need to revisit 5-3 and 5-4 (at least).

Professor Layton and the Unwound Future

Main game beaten. I managed to find 290 hint coins of an apparent 300, and I'm satisfied with that. The missing ones were most likely hidden, and it's not like I ever use more than a fifth of them anyway.

This time I ventured some guesses about how the plot would run itself off the rails in the eleventh hour. My hypothesis, given the talking rabbit, was that Future London was a completely computer-simulated world created for some kind of nasty experiments. Big Luke and Dimitri Allen were virtual representations of the two jackasses running the show. (Hey, the Laytonverse has a village full of robots, a time machine and a transforming carplane among other things—it's not outside the realm of "reason".)

...This was not right, but closer than I'd hoped. The truth, as usual, was sillier. Thinking back, my guess was probably too close to the end of the last game to be 100% correct anyway.

I've got maybe three or four puzzles before the last Layton's Challenge house unlocks. I don't think I've put in the password for Diabolical Box yet, but I don't remember.

Professor Layton and the Diabolical Box

Turns out the code generated for Curious Village is DS-specific, so if I want to unlock the puzzle I'm going to have to borrow a copy of the game from somewhere. Ughhhh. Worse comes to worst I can buy a used copy from GameStop, get the password and return it within 7 days to get my money back.

Aside from that, I've only got two puzzles left in the Puzzle Master's room. I guess while I'm at the mall I could download all the Weekly Puzzles and squeeze a bit more out of the game, though.

Making my way back to the entrance of the Towering Pagoda. I've explored the bookshop already.

...I was making this entry to remind myself to go back for the two hint coins I knew I was missing, but I found them five minutes after turning on my DSi to determine how many puzzles I'd solved—the cat's paw on the pet shop sign and in the water cooler next to the noodle shop.

Final Fantasy: The 4 Heroes of Light

Made it to whatever-the-merchant-town-is-called where Jusqua has to set up a store. That's where I turned the game off because I really did not feel like having to pick through the few items I won't miss in storage so I can hand 10k over to a con man. Ugh. Fuck that, there is a dungeon in the middle of town! Grab Yunita and get going.

Oh, and it turns out there was some kind of flame dagger in Liberte. I couldn't really afford it without selling even more things off (I already parted with a number of gems to buy better armor...) so on a hunch I went without. Turns out I was right; the NPCs in this area are telling me to pick up a flame shield and a water weapon.

Known Boss Weaknesses

• Greaps - fire
• Sand Devil - water
• Brainshark - fire

I may go back and document enemy weaknesses as well.

Professor Layton and the Unwound Future

Making my way toward the casino to meet Luke. I've rooted out the three hint coins per screen thus far (plus a few hidden ones) so I have lke 70 already.

• Picture books: 1/3 complete
• Toy Car tracks: 1/10 complete

Professor Layton and the Diabolical Box

I estimate I've got four puzzles left in the Layton's Challenge section. One final, horrendous peg solitaire puzzle, and then the next room finishing that will unlock.

I beat the story mode yesterday, without bothering to find all the hint coins. (Hell, I didn't even figure out there were three per screen until the garbage heap in Folsense.) As per usual, the ending was total bullshit handwaving, but who plays Layton games for plot anyway? I just have to wonder if the third one will be even more nonsensical.

And of course there are secret codes from the first and third games to be put in. (I sold the first game ages ago without realizing that.) Oh, well. GameFAQs. The fact that I don't care enough about this game to give it its own completion entry is probably telling. I'm most likely going to start Unwound Future before I pick this back up; might as well get the code so I can unlock whatever-it-is at the same time I finish all the puzzles.

Final Fantasy: The 4 Heroes of Light

This game is really compelling! I don't regret having paid almost full price for it anymore. Great music; I'll have to consider importing the OST. I love how it forces you to manage your items/skills really tightly.

Just gotten Aire joined back up with Brandt to go through the Fairy Path to Arbor. I got careless and died on my first battle in the caves, but it's not like I was really trying too hard. I have a harp stored up, so I might see what kind of effect wielding it with the Bard crown has. (The Bandit crown seems like it might be a good alternative to Wayfarer when I don't need to run from anything.)

The lack of fire-elemental weapons is getting a little annoying.

I've been very lax on updating this thing, as I've been writing daily updates on the games I play in my 750 Words entries instead. But I did want to make a note about this here.

After exactly three years and five months, I've finally beaten the first Etrian Odyssey.

My final party:

• Landsknecht (Calla) - lv 62
• Protector (Sally) - lv 59
• Dark Hunter (Darius) lv 58
• Medic (Nine) lv 56
• Alchemist (Xanad) lv 61

I used no healing items. In several strokes of incredible luck, Darius kept binding whatever body part Etreant needed to execute the action he was about to perform that turn. I never saw Inferno, though damned if he didn't try. I think he got Thorns off once during the entire battle, and both Defender and Immunize were up so the damage was negligible.

His last hurrah was managing to cast Cyclone after erasing all of my buffs. It one-shotted everyone but Sally and Calla—who would have been dead next turn if Calla hadn't finished him off with a Cleaver. 532 HP damage.

...I'm still a little shellshocked.

But this I vow—the second game will not take me as long.

The final blow to the final boss: Torneko tripped and fell flat on his face—his sword critting Pisaro for 259 HP damage. Wow.

Time Taken Till Ending:

32:35

Battles:

575

Monsters Defeated:

1488

Total Gold From Battles:

72387 G

Victories:

552

Times Wiped Out:

2

Times Fled:

20

Maximum Damage in One Hit:

279

Clear Level:

32 (Torneko 32/Maya 32/Kiryl 33/Ragnar 31/Alena 34/Borya 30/Meena 30)

Title: Caretaker Corps

I'm seriously tempted to buy the BradyGames guide just to find out what all the titles are and their requirements. My current one is "Deadly Diva".

I suspect that I ended up with Caretaker Corps because there were so many deaths during that final battle. Kiryl and Meena didn't have enough MP to burn on resurrections since Pisaro's final form could easily kill two members per turn if they weren't at full health, or buffed well, or lucky. (And Borya even if he was.) So there were a number of dead bodies stacked in the wagon. It didn't help that while I remembered to shuffle around equippables properly before the final boss, I forgot to dispense the consumables. All the permanent stat-boosters are still in my bag, among other things which might have helped like Yggdrasil dew.

It was tough. When Torneko gets the last blow, you know things are seriously desperate. He wasn't the last one alive though, thanks to Omniheal spam.

Apparently there are still 51 monsters missing from my bestiary...yikes!

Before I forget about it, I'm at the very freakin' end of Dragon Quest IV. Last dungeon. I actually took on the last boss—but much like almost every other boss fight, it ended in death after significant struggle. I made it to his last form!

A big part of my strategy for next time relies on actually getting the Sage's Stone. I saw it out there, but admitted defeat on trying to find it. Kicking myself for not actually inspecting the corridor with all those demon statues. I actually did examine one of them out of simple curiosity, but as my luck would have it, it wasn't the un-paired one!

...Possessing that might have actually pushed me over the edge since I wouldn't have needed to do as much awkward character and healing-spell juggling with Kiryl, Meena and the Heroine. But I also blew as many tokens as I could on Magic Waters, so hopefully I won't have MP supply problems like last time. So happy I actually looked in Endor and noticed they're one of the casino rewards!

(The only other item worth getting from the Casino would be the Falcon Blade, but it's 65000 tokens LOL so fuck that.)

Other important things:

• Spell damage doesn't hurt nearly as much as bashing him over the fuckin' head. Save mage MPs for healing/buffing/sapping.
• The Zenithian Sword dispels enemy status buffs! Wish I'd found that out before wasting so much time being unable to Sap the last form due to Bounce. I only tried using it when I got desperate, hoping it'd cast some crazy-powerful offensive spell.
• Insulatle on the later forms is a must. Unfortunately I no longer remember when the forms start casting fire and ice spells. I think it's after he loses his head?

Might go in with Heroine/Alena/Kyril/Borya?

1. Kyril buffs, Borya saps.
2. Kyril buffs again, Borya oomphs Heroine.
3. Kyril buffs a third time, or heals if necessary. Borya oomphs Alena.
4. Swap Alena for Ragnar. Borya oomphs and Kyril buffs Ragnar.
5. Swap Alena back into her spot, Ragnar into Kyril's spot. DO MASSIVE DAMAGE until the buffs or debuffs start wearing off

...This would mean Borya holds the Sage's Stone, I guess, and that he should gank all of Maya's good equipment. Kinda wincing at this thought because seriously he is about four levels behind Alena. :(

that was quite possibly the most satisfying victory I've had in quite some time, even though it was nowhere near as close as my fight with the Marquis.

• Heroine 27
• Alena 26
• Kiryl 25
• Maya 24

I did fight about ten extra battles because I honestly thought I wasn't a high enough level to attempt this boss. I think Alena, Maya and the Heroine leveled once. But when I got sick of the ten minutes or so of grinding (as suspected, I'm really not cut out for it) and went to the boss, I remembered something.

Kaclang.

Completely nullified the absolute worst he could dish out. I was positively giddy. I used it once more to avoid one of his charged attacks while everyone was low on HP, but it wasn't truly necessary.

A lot of luck and great timing was involved in making this victory a relatively safe one. I can't count the number of times Estark would nullify all my buffs right before Kiryl's turn to stack another Kabuff. Maya died once but I was able to keep my ducks in a row long enough to resurrect her. (Even with three failed attempts.) Honestly, I got so lucky that I suspect I could have taken him without those extra levels at all, if I'd remembered Kaclang.

The other thing that really helped me was noticing that the Heroine casts Midheal faster than Kiryl. At first I was extremely reluctant to put her on heal duty, since the last thing I wanted was to get caught up in a vicious he-attacks-everyone-heals cycle—but then I realized something that should have been obvious: Everyone else can do whatever, but Alena will always be dishing out physical damage because that's all she can do! It was perfect.

I was so elated I didn't really catch where I needed to go next. But I'm pretty sure it's Rosehill.

So I definitely felt like breaking out the Dragon Quest IV today, much to my surprise. The dungeon was a whole lot more straight-forward than I remembered, but just in case I end up forgetting again:

Mines: Always head up and (I'm pretty sure) to the right.
Cave:
1F: In the first door. Up the steps
2F: Instead of going up, take the stairs back down
1F: Head for the door toward the northeast that was unreachable the last time we were on this floor
2F: Up the stairs
3F: Boss.

Super short. Mercifully short.

The three monsters before Estark were super easy. Estark himself...hoo boy. The guy opens up with 50+ HP damage to all party members, then gets a second turn.

...what is this I don't even

After that initial shock put me into panic mode, I screwed up all my tactics then proceeded to put up a reasonably valiant fight which ended when Kiryl died and left me with no way to resurrect anyone.

Turning to miss lufia's FAQ, I should be level 29 for this one. I'm only about 4 or 5 levels behind, so it should be pretty doable with some clever thinking and none of last attempt's stupidity. I mean, I didn't even get around to casting Sap, for crying out loud. The guy hits hard but not OHKO hard, and with some proper Kabuffing I should be able to mitigate that anyway.

I will admit, what I really wish is that I had a "Healus" (I'm assuming) equivalent for Kiryl. It would really take the teeth out of his somnia-induced group attack.

Oh yeah, and the moosifers seem to be invulnerable to fire magic.

The front row keeps getting decimated by Rollers, and resurrection + inn fees are wiping me out! At one point I dipped so low that I couldn't even afford a Warp Wire without help.

...That was when I caved and made a Protector to soak front row damage.
Now she's almost as effective as my Landsknecht, despite being three levels lower. I might have to replace the latter.

I'm also thinking of going Troubadour just to see what's up. If they've got a "boost defense" spell, I might be able to avoid the Protector. The problem is, who do I switch out? Medic and Alchemist are practically requirements. My Landsknecht (or Protector) needs to be the heavy physical damage dealer. So that leaves the Survivalist or the Dark Hunter.

Poison has been so useful, though I hear it's barely effective against the big bosses. Also, the strongest whip I have access to is better than the strongest bow.

But Trueshot isn't bad, and the Survivalist almost always draws first blood even if the DH is a close second. I'm leaning Survivalist, but I'm going to have to think a lot harder about it.

Got my first game over in the Etrian Odyssey restart of a restart. Ended up running down to the third floor late at night. Managed to remember how to navigate past the first Stalker (and even the second!)

...Then Calla died. I managed to survive one battle (I think Martin may have died in a stroke of poor luck?) so I could speak with Ren and Tlachtga in the second room, then prepared to warp out...only to find that I had neglected to purchase any Warp Wires before making this run. There was no escape. Ended up being able to run from one battle (Darius and Nine died in the attempt).

Xanad, with his whopping 1HP remaining, managed to make it no more than five steps before running into another. And that was the end.

This time around I'm doing what I'll call, for lack of a better term, an "unforgiving" playthrough.

• No resets if someone dies during a high-exp battle.
• No saving map data if my party's wiped out.
• No resets if I end up guessing incorrectly while allotting skill points.

...What do you mean there's nothing in any of those fucking barrels/crates?!

Do you seriously intend to tell me that I spent like an hour on this fight letting this stupid Gadgeteer chip away at Felius just so I can have the pleasure of resetting for about the third time?

God fuck it.

...

I love pretty much everything about this game, though. It's great. Labyrinthia is the whole package.

Drill Dozer

Ugh, underwater controls. I take back what I said about this game being the hottest shit that you never bought. There are some serious flaws here.

...Anyway, that mess over with (hopefully forever) the game should get back to being awesome. The shop finally got in a drill upgrade, so hopefully I'll be able to bust those blue blocks open now. Might be the shiny metal ones. Don't care. The funny thing is, I think I'm so far along in the main game (there are only five diamonds to find—the last one is probably the final boss and I've got two) that I might as well wait until I have all the drill upgrades, then scour the beginning levels for all the stuff I missed. No sense in doing it piecemeal.

A Boy and His Blob

Game is still very charming, but still very easy, and I'm blazing through it.

I figured I should start doing the challenge levels while I'm still in that world to save myself some loading time, so instead of starting 2-2 I went back to world 1 and...did all the challenge levels. The difficulty was all over the place, which isn't so good. C1-4 required a little precision but was more of a speed bump than an obstacle. C1-7 had me stumped for a bit, but the rest were on par with the normal levels. Haven't tried C2-1 yet though.

A Boy and His Blob

At level 1-9, and have all the treasure chests but one. Beautiful as it is, I can't see myself keeping this one after I beat it. Which, based on this night's progress, might happen sooner rather than later—I stopped myself once I realized how quickly I was progressing. The game just came in today! I gotta at least digest it a little...

...It's so mellow that I'm thinking of using it as a sleep aid. No pressure whatsoever. When you die the checkpoint is about three strides away. No timer, infinite jellybeans. Maybe that's one of the reasons I'm a little ambivalent on it, actually.

Drill Dozer

Still great, but...the levels are long enough to be annoying for a handheld game. Normally it's "nice" to be able to sleep or save/quit at any point...with this game it's a must, because I typically only have the time to navigate a fourth of a stage before I have to put it down for one reason or another.

At 3-1 now, still waiting (hoping) for some kind of a high jump. I know I've gotta be getting some powerups at some point, because there's no way to get the items behind blue or shiny metal blocks.

Whatever, I just blew all my chips on extra E-Tanks. Maybe the old dude at the shop will stock some other upgrades sooner if I buy him out of what he's got.

Drill Dozer

I keep getting interrupted during 2-1! There is a treasure at the very start of the level, too high for me to reach. Either I'm gonna get an increased jump, or I really need to learn how to wield a drill better (bounce off the enemy up to the platform). I'm banking on the former and plowing ahead, because this game should not be taking me this long.

Rogue Hearts Dungeon

After two false starts, I made a smashingly successful run of the first dungeon. But when I got out...almost none of the items I'd gathered were in the item list! How the hell do you get them there? I really hope you don't have to perform all the actions for them to be identified, but...I accidentally did that with one of the few things that did show up (a non-magical staff, lol) so that may be the case...